Birthday Week

It's my birthday week! I am turning a quarter of a century! Geez. I'm getting old. I'm actually really scared to turn 30 but I shouldn't worry about that for now. For 25 years, I have been through a lot- personally and professionally. In spite of all I have been through, I believe I am much more braver and stronger now. There are a lot of things I am thankful for.

I will take this time to thank everything/everyone who has influenced me and helped me become a better person.

1. God.
    I used to be a really "religious" person. I was an active participant in Church, I was even on the praise and worship team. I don't know when exactly I started to drift away. It's a shame since three of my mom's siblings are pastors and my mom now has become one. I'm trying to make amends, as my personal relationship with God is concerned. In spite of my disobedience, God has showed me His faithfulness. He has extended to me all favors- especially with my work right now.

2. Parents
    This is such a no-brainer! Parents are our first teachers, friends, and occasional enemies. They are the first one to provide or demonstrate unconditional love. They guide us, motivate us and mold us to become the best version of ourselves. I have a really close relationship with my parents. Even though we may not see eye to eye, we have a deep understanding and respect for each other. I love my parents PERIOD.

3. Family

I'm very very close to my family, especially on my mom's side. We're a tight knit family and I've had fun growing up with them. Even though some of them have gone to marry and have kids or abroad, we still maintain a good relationship and open communication. I think God has gifted me with a very dynamic family and that's one of my family's strengths. Even though we have very different personalities, we maintain the respect due towards each other, especially to the older ones. Family is everything.

4. Friends

Be it friends from elementary, high school or college, I am thankful for their presence in my life. Although I have had a lot of "groups of friends" in the past, I have maintained a good relationship with a very trusted few and I am happy that I did. I can proudly say I have friends who do not judge. If they doubt my decision or ideas, they tell me right away and encourage me even more. I don't have "frenemies"- my friends are non-pretentious and do not befriend me just because they need me for something. True friends are treasures we should keep because no one or nothing can replace them.

5. The Love of my life, PJ.

Almost 7 years and this guy stuck around! Haha! But really, I'm not the easiest person one can deal with and it still surprises me up to this day that he's with me. He's the only one I've been with longer than 2 years. He knows everything about me. He's my best friend, brother, lover and everything rolled into one! He's such a great guy and now that we're actually planning on having a future together excites me. I love him so dearly- we've both seen each other not only on our best but even during the worst times, and we're still here. No turning back.

Happy birthday, to me! :)

Gangnam Style Dance Dare

Cool kids on the block doing the gangnam style. Teehee! Fun video.

Swift

It's November already! I am nearing 25 and it's freaking me out a little bit. Being 25 gets me nearer 30- the age I fear the most. Haha! It seems like I slept on the night of October 31st and now, we're a week into the month! How time flies! I wish time would go a little bit slower. Sometimes, I like to just sit and think of what happened to me in a week's time and I could see how fast people come and go; how fast events happen; how fast the days go by. Every time I think of it it wears me out, I feel tired.

Happy Birthday, Munchkin! ❤

Hello first day of November!☺



I would also like to greet my cousin a happy happy 25th birthday! We're born on the same month and same year so we basically grew up together! She has been my bestfriend and confidant. My childhood couldn't be more fun if not for her! I love her like a sister!


Kisses! ❤😘

Burnout

How many times can a person feel this way? I feel like I have a very very short fuse. I don't like what I'm feeling! This is the first time I am ever really passionate (well, aside from my accessory store) and yet I'm not feeling too good about it now. It seems like every time I work, at first it's something I'm very positive and so passionate about. Six months later, that same passion is nowhere to be found and work becomes, well... work. I do not enjoy it anymore. I am just getting by the day without being proactive. I come to work and do what they need me to do and not what I have to do.

I have a very complex job and being involved in operations is quite an interesting job but also too physically tiring! I do not have a lot of complaints about my job because I get to have time for myself and even time to go out with friends even on a weekday. However, things are taking slowly taking a toll on my body and I'm super stressed out with work. I think it's really different if you really love what you do and you visualize yourself living and breathing your job. For me, I came into picture because I needed a job and they needed someone to do the job.

I really need a break. :(

Happy Graduation, Sister!

Two Sundays ago, my sister graduated from college. It was a busy day since she had her baccalaureate in the morning and her graduation in the afternoon. It would've been great though, if we could share moments like this with our dad; I'm pretty sure he'd be proud. Our dad is usually away from us for work and we understand that truly and we're grateful for his sacrifices.

I felt nostalgic after dropping my mom and my sister off at school in the morning. Same time three years ago, I was in the same situation. I also graduated from college. It feels weird every time I' go back to school to visit or for events. I kind-of miss the feeling of being a student. But when you're a student, you always look forward to graduating.

It has been a cliché but I think it's just on point what they say about graduation: "It is not the end, but a beginning of a new chapter in your life." That new chapter could be finding a job, going to grad school, putting up your own business, or even to go on a sabbatical. We go through different chapters to find our purpose. And to my dear sister (who I know will not read this, LOL) find your purpose and congratulations!

Enjoy the photos!

xo

My sister just before her baccalaureate.

My sister and mom =)

My sister and mom with my sister's batchmate who graduated Cum Laude

They call themselves "SpEdians"

Flowers from her mommy (READ: our aunt)

ze graduate

Graduated with the degree of Bachelor of Science in Special Education

With her college friends

Again, with her college friends

lining up

With her bestfriends and mom

Mom, the happy and proud parent.

CHEERS! :)

Hello, October!

Can I just say that the months have been passing us by like a whirlwind! CRAAZZY! Now October's here and the first week just passed by. Oh how time flies! Next thing I know I'm on a plane going somewhere far... *wink* Anyway, this post is about how my first week of October went through photos.

October 1st, Monday. Monday was basketball day. I went to watch PJ's first game with my sister and his sister.

Dordie, Me, and Doc Jet :)

Go BLUE!  PJ's team lost though.

October 2. Tuesday, no photos. Well, I was a little busy making slides for my presentation the following day.

October 3, Wednesday. Day of presentation and calibration meeting, visit from head bosses from Manila and dinner with family.

My sister and mom

with Cousins Cha and Joan

October 4, Thursday. The weather was crazy. And we were all lazy at the office. After my shift I went to meet with my mom and cousins again.

Elaisha's. Had breakfast here with my workmate, Fatima. It was pouring!!!

Intense rain juxtaposed to a beautiful sunset. 

ootd. LOL 

My cousin who wants to be a kung fu master by doing a yoga pose.  LOL

October 5, Friday. Yesterday was "beauty day" for me and my sister, we had our hair colored. :) 

Ready to become a RED HEAD! 

My hair's supposed to be all burgundy but... it's virgin hair so it looks brown! :P

October 6, Saturday. Today's weather is kind of crazy as well. Instead of going home around noon, I arrived at 2PM since I got stuck in the office waiting for the rain to stop! Today was however, the day I updated my software. I'm just getting used to ios6!

Is it the best there is?

How did your first week of October, go? 

Kisses,

larraineBee

Unusual Heartbreak

2 months ago, I underwent an ultrasound. I was not expecting to have one, although i did expect to be pregnant. I went to a gynecologist to have myself checked since all pregnancy tests i took came back negative. Many girls my age would be so happy, close to triumphant even that they aren't- but I'm not. I wanted to get pregnant. I wanted to have my own baby. So when the gynecologist couldn't figure out my case, he suggested I get an ultrasound test.


I was really scared, not because it was my first time but because the test might bear bad news. Ultimately, it did. I found out I wasn't pregnant and knowing why made me feel really weak. My legs were shaking a lil bit. My heart was pounding and I felt like all my blood rushed from my head down to the ground in a matter of seconds. I was terrified. But I was even terrified of what PJ would say. I was thinking that maybe he'd break up with me because I COULDN'T GET PREGNANT.

I never knew I'd undergo such a case but I have bilateral polycystic ovaries. This means that both my ovaries have multiple subcapsular follicles which hinders me of pregnancy. The doctor already gave me medicine so I could have my period regularly and also prescribed something to cure my condition. However, this medicine was so hard to find! I had to ask my mom to help me in finding it to no avail and asking my mom to do that was no ordinary conversation. I really had to muster all the courage I had within me to be able to tell her my condition.

I still haven't got that prescribed medicine, that's why I'm going in for a check-up with another gynecologist. I really feel so heartbroken over this matter. It's terrifying to know that I might not actually be able to reproduce. Of all my friends, I'm the one who's really close to kids and vocally expressing my desire to have a child. I'm still very hopeful though that I'll be able to get through this. I'm still young and I have a long time to recover from all this trauma. I still believe that one day, God will look down on me and will allow me to have my desire come to reality. I'm hoping for the best.


Never give up!

larraineBee ❤

Fulfilled Saturdate

Being together for almost 7 years, my boyfriend and I don't really have romantic dates anymore. Romantic for us would be fancy dinners, movie dates, candles, roses- the works. Normally we'd watch a movie and eat after or vice-versa but we never categorize that as romantic but well, it's a date. However, as time passed, our dates consist of trips to the city or downtown (Chinatown) to buy materials for my online accessories shop, grocery, and/or doing errands together. Pretty boring I might say but we enjoy it apparently.

This Saturday was no different. I go to work and we meet up after. We webt around the city to look for a hula-hoop, a meter stick and threads, needles and cloth usually used for cross-stiching. They're projects for my scholar. We then had a little snack at a bread store across Central Market. We met up with my cousins after that to look for florists for her wedding on December! Whew! We did a lot on that day but it was fulfilling for me. It kind-of brought a smile to my face.

A couple of photos of my Saturdate! ☺

Hello from us! 

PJ eating the "crab bread

Not My Day

When I woke up this morning, I had a terrible feeling... My throat was so itchy and I had exaggerated runny nose! I have been nursing this flu the whole day. Good thing I didn't have fever, like I normally do. I'm doing as much as I can so I can recover quickly because its super difficult to work when your head is about to explode, you're coughing like there's no tomorrow and sniffing thereafter! Sounds like "tunog tao", I swear!

The day could've ended just fine. However, as I am about to sleep, I have another mishap being the clumsy girl that I am. I was bending over to put something in the trash can and accidentally my eye hit the end of the hanger, placed on my closet door! My left eye now hurts and burns a little bit! Why did this have to happen? I'm so scared! I don't care if I get a cut or bruise in my arm or leg because both can still function after recuperation. The eyes, however, cannot. Once your eyes are "destroyed", bruised, etc you can say goodbye to your eyesight! I cannot imagine my life without my sense of sight! How can I drive? How will I be able to see people I'm talking to? How will I be able to work? I don't want to miss out on life.


Moral lesson: be careful... EXTRA CAREFUL!


Goodnight,
larraineBee ❤

Where did the time go?

"What do you want to do tomorrow?"

"Uhmmm... I dunno. Go to the beach?"

"Which beach exactly?"

"Somewhere far..."


That was one conversation I had 2-3 years ago with my boyfriend, PJ. We weren't really in the mood to go swimming, we just wanted a breather. living in the city is so toxic that you just want to pull yourself away. We both went to the beach with a mission: to hang out an talk. It may not something you normally do at the beach but that's what we did. It was random. Refreshing. We took the time to slow down and we loved it. It was a random thought. A spontaneous act.


Nowadays, I rarely get to slow down because of work although I'm so happy I get to spend equal time with my boyfriend, friends and family. Sometimes though, even when I'm on a break, work finds me. It's like I'm on call. I was never told I'd be on-call but I can't complain. I enjoy my job especially because I have such good rapport with my workmates. I just wish sometimes though I can pull myself away. Go somewhere where there's no cellphone signal so no one would bother me, somewhere calm, somewhere I can enjoy even just for a few days.

I still am positive though that I can have even just one day to relax and get away.


Hope you had a great weekend!

xoxo,
larraineBee

A quick post...

I'm leaving for Bacolod tomorrow. I'll be leaving very early actually, I don't even know why I'm still up when I should already be sleeping. I'll be there for a day for work but I'll be coming back in the afternoon. I really don't feel like going, up until now. However, my "attendance"/ presence is not optional but required so I really NEED to go. What keeps me interested with the trip though is that I don't get to be stuck the whole day in front of a computer, replying to e-mails and stuff. LOL We'll be on site tomorrow, checking units that will be turned over to their owners. I just hope that it doesn't rain tomorrow because I'm too scared to travel when it's raining. We'll be travelling by ferry/boat so a rainy weather is not welcome. Anyway, will try to go to sleep now.


Good night!
larraineBee

Hello, Monday.

So I'm here at work and contemplating on what to do since I've done most of what I should. I'm currently here in our sales office, which I do every Monday so I can report to my boss. I actually like my boss. She's really nice and accommodating, also down to earth. She does not drive me nuts when she needs reports from me. I feel like I'm just cruising through this, which I kind-of like. But what I really love about my job is when I'm on site- construction site, that is. It gives me a different high especially when documenting progress of every house that's being built up to the time I have to turn the unit over to the owner. The first month I felt like I was a fish out of water. I was so clueless on what I needed to do. Now, I've been working for three months and going up to four and it feels like I've been doing this for a very long time. There may be times that I'm struggling with myself because there are times when I feel like I'm just dragging myself to work but I still like what I do. I still like that I have client/customer interface from time to time and most especially, I love that I'm on the field- literally, well,  construction field that is. Sometimes though, because my work does not entail heavy e-mails and physical work, I get really bored. Just like today. But today is Monday, everybody doesn't like Monday... I think. I need to always psyche myself so I can do even better. I just love it that even if I'm not really that trained in this field, I still get to please my boss and she recognizes my effort and always compliments me. Maybe that's the reason why I don't mind being stuck at this job even if my salary is just so-so.

Hello, Monday!

How did your Monday go?

Finding Purpose in Dreams

Sometimes, I'm too caught up in my ideal/perfect world. Of course, it's just a fragment of my imagination. Things I wished were happening to me, things I wish I had, places I wished to visit... the list goes on. In my perfect world, the sky's the limit! There's no problem with accessibility to anything, and the choices are limitless. Sometimes I wish I could really live in that world. A world where I am successful, I am looked up as a "powerful" woman- and I don't mean the Wonder Woman type.  However, as it is just a fragment of my imagination and I'm just a human being, I need to stop thinking about the "what if's" and make life happen with anything I currently have. I guess having a "perfect world" for yourself can actually motivate you to do better in work, school, etc. It's like you're guiding yourself and projecting where you'd like to be in the future, what you want to attain. Of course, in REAL life, there aren't any shortcuts. We need to undergo a lot of disappointments, failures, heartaches, happiness, etc before we get to where we foresee ourselves to be. It is a whirlwind of emotions, sometimes it's so overwhelming. Having a balance in your life and people close to you such as family and friends can definitely help you get through life from day to day. I wish I could say that I've achieved something greater and say that I've found myself in a place I projected I would be. Somehow, I still have a long way to go. I'm just so motivated right now because things are slowly falling into place no matter how slow they picked up. I am so excited and really looking forward to what I can really become in 5 to 10 years from now. I guess the purpose of keeping that "imagination" kept me alive and motivated me to do something about my life if I wanted to become somebody at least for myself. Setting goals can be very difficult and sometimes not aligned with our strengths but I do believe that whatever we set our hearts and minds into, we will definitely land on the very spot we have hoped for ourselves.

And with that, I'll leave you with a few quotes from people who dreamt of  big things and made them come true.

* "Dreams are extremely important. You can't do it unless you imagine it." 
-- George Lucas

* "It was the man's dream, and his inspiring attempt to make them come true that remain important." Francis Ford Coppola 

*"Dream no small dreams for they have no power to move the hearts of men." Goethe

And with that, I bid you all good night! 

Quotes' Source

I Miss Traveling

It's been a long time since I last went to a place to travel. I usually go to Bacolod/Talisay (Negros Occidental) but for work. I want to go some place where I can just relax and admire the view and of course, throw in a little shopping! The last time I traveled was to Manila, March this year and it was just for a week, I think. No fancy places- I just shopped! HAHA. The side-trip was when we went to Antipolo for a short while and went back to the city. I kind-of missed that feeling. I usually like to witness scenic places and be amazed at how magical a place can be but I do whatever I can to enjoy with whatever I can afford. LOL Although I have to admit, I kind-of not help shopping when I'm traveling! :D


Sorry, I just dug up photos from my slr's SD card and saw pictures of my vacation in Manila.


Photos coming up! ;)

self-photo at Banapple, Katipunan

PJ and I outside Banapple

Super Yummy fries with Nacho beef at Five Cows, Trinoma

Indulged again on Nail polish! ;)

At a Park, somewhere in Makati (Sorry, I forgot the name)

Greenbelt at Night

First time to try Gelatissimo and LOVED IT.

The Fort, Taguig

Copying poses

Strolling High Street

Photo-op at the BHS sign

Beautiful Art Installations

Spot Me ;)

Doc Jet enjoying her gelato! 

going back...

EASTWOOD//CUBAO//PASAY

Road picture

Church outside MOA.

That's all for now. Update again, soon! 

Good morning/night! It's 12:41AM here, 19th of July. I have to be at work by 8:00AM. Yikes! Byeeee! :) I need to rest! 

Kisses,

larraineBee <3

Late night thoughts of an anemic posted in the afternoon

Since today is the last day of June, I am trying to look back on what I have done on the first six months of 2012- what my life has been or what changed, what achievements I acquired and what are the things I regret or frustrations I wished never took place. I realized that part of it is the change which is the change of the nature of my work. Don't get me wrong, I like what I do and I'm enjoying it. It's what I'd call a good change. As far as achievements, I don't think there's any major achievements. Being appreciated for a job well done would make it to my list as an achievement. I like the feeling that people recognize your hard work. It gives you more motivation to strive even more. As for frustrations, well, I had one but i don't want to talk about it. I'd rather think that I faired well on the first six months of 2012.




Photos soon! 




Kisses,

larraineBee <3

Fresh Start

Time to... update!

So here's what I have been busy with lately:

for checking and making notes

Monitoring... EVERYDAY!

Usual kicks. #chucks

Nike trainers on site

THE LIST

Hello from me! :)

Just started...

Progress...

Aaaand yes, I now work for a real estate company and I always make this clear, I do not sell houses! I'm part of internal operations and this is what my life is usually. Monitoring lists, counter-checking, site visits, making reports...and that's just a fraction of my job. Part of it is making clients happy and well-accommodated,  and part of it is making sure deliverable goods are of good quality and on time. It's all very new to me since I haven't been really exposed to real estate. I learned now of how things really work. I'm so happy that I'm part of the operations because I am so exposed to a lot of things- mostly engineering which I was really so clueless when I started. Now, I have picked up a few things along the way. I kind of like it too, since they're making me go back and forth from Iloilo to Bacolod and vice-versa. I cannot wait when they take me to other places. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for that. It seems like it was just a few weeks when I started but boy! I have been in this position for almost two months! Yikes! Time flies so fast! Good thing I love my job! It's more fun when I'm working on site. I get to go around the village and see the progress of each unit. I get amazed with things like that- especially when it's new to me. I really hope that I do not lose this passion and appreciation for this job because it doesn't feel like a job- well, sometimes it does. But it really is true what they say- if you're happy with what you do, it becomes less of a job.

Love what you do and be happy!

xx,
larraineBee <3